Dining Secretly in Sudbury Open Prison

Having written recently about the fantastic food at Fischer’s I though perhaps I would redress the balance slightly and let you know about a very nice lunch we had recently at the Secret Diner, in Sudbury (Derbyshire) Open Prison.

Just for your interest, Sudbury is a Category D open prison for males which I gather means it will usually be for non violent short term or prisoners at the end of a long sentence. Prisoners can wander freely but have to show up for roll calls etc; we do quite often hear of prisoners absconding from Sudbury, and whilst that might be foolish, it can’t be very difficult to do. When we visited, it did look as if there was a fence of sorts, but nothing too off-putting if you were determined to get out.

Anyway, the prison has quite recently opened a restaurant, in the grounds but just outside the fence. The building is an old Nissan hut, but clean and attractively decorated. The Diner doubles as a staff canteen and is only open from 11.30am to 1pm on weekdays. It’s probably advisable to ring to book – the number is 01283 584000 and the postcode for Satnavs is DE6 5HW.

The very sound idea behind the Secret Diner is that it provides an excellent opportunity for prisoners, who can put the training and experience they receive to good use when they get out. I couldn’t tell who were prisoners and who were staff, but it didn’t seem to matter in the slightest.

You won’t be surprised to hear it is not exactly fine dining; one sits at formica tables and queues up to be served but the food was more than acceptable, very plentiful, with lots of choice and all extremely reasonably priced. We went with a crowd of Parwich friends and we all thoroughly enjoyed the meal and the occasion. We were almost embarrassed it was so cheap, and although the staff were extremely pleasant, we weren’t allowed to leave a tip although it was suggested that if we wished we could donate to some charities they support, including the local branch of Riding for the Disabled, which we were all glad to do. We had a three-course meal, with coffee and it came to well under £10 each.

After lunch several of us visited their Farm Shop, where they sell vegetables etc that the prisoners grow, and things they have made like bird feeders and nesting boxes. I was very taken by the fact that there also several dozen pairs of identical black men’s size 8 shoes, being sold for £2.50 each! No other sizes, no other colours… That was an unanswered mystery and if anyone can ever solve it for me I shall be grateful.

Keep the Home Fires Burning?

A busy day today and it is pleasant to relax now.

Fridays are always busy but today was busier than necessary.

We had a Fire Safety Assessment scheduled for today (they had to have entry into both barns, so it had to be a Friday). When I realised today was also our cleaning day I rang to explain that we would not have much time to spare, could we perhaps suggest that another day might be better? The very pleasant man assured me there was absolutely no need to worry. ‘We’ll only take a few minutes of your time he said and then we’ll spend the rest inspecting both barns on our own’.

Well, rather predictably, the whole visit took over two hours, and for a lot of it in spite of their assurances, they needed one of us there. As John was busy power washing our stone slabs which with all this rain were getting very potentially slippery, of course the one of us the Fire Audit men needed was me. I must have appeared very distracted and possibly not as cooperative as I/they would have wished. When you want, as we do, each barn to look immaculate when guests arrive, so it feels to them as if no one has ever been before, this doesn’t happen by chance. It takes 4 1/2 to 5 hours of sheer physical (loving – we take a pride in it) slog. And it’s got to be ready when the guests arrive. Unlike some deadlines, there is no scope for saying ‘ Sorry, I’ll be a day or two late’, or even an hour or two…

Anyway, with John drafted in after he’d got all the slabs looking startlingly anaemic and for the moment not even potentially slippery, and all was well. We finished in time, as did Janet in Tom’s Barn, so that’s that for a couple of days.

Ad as for the audit, we now await the official report. Nothing dramatic was mentioned today; we were told we ought to have an extra smoke detector at the top of the stairs in both barns and one or two other very sensible suggestions. After all, the last thing anyone wants is a fire so any advice to help prevent the likelihood is gratefully received and acted upon if practicable

More news later, when we have received the report.

Stop the Brain Rot: Train the Brain!

This afternoon our son suggested, kindly, that I might enjoy the challenge of training my brain, and recommended a site he uses called Luminosity. More or less simultaneously I spotted a link – needless to say, on Twitter, to an article by Graham Jones, an ‘Internet Psychologist’ in which he claims, very convincingly that regular use of the Internet affects our intellect and memory.

The bogey used to be too much telly making one fat and passive, now the threat is our intellect and memory shrinking through lack of use: in other words, brain rot, brought on by being locked excessively in an intimate and essentially superficial world of one’s own, shared only with a computer/tablet/smart phone. And we’re still all getting fat because we’re still all sitting all the time. We’ve just swopped one screen for another.

So, I am wondering, should one try to redress the balance, and embark on these brain games? I think yes, ‘if only for the fun of it’, but deep down it feels much more than simply fun. Apparently most people are unaware that they no longer rely on their memory, or their intellect, but rely on the internet to nanny them. We are spoon-fed bulleted facts, reminders, calculations, grammar and punctuation. We have become impatient for results, lazy, with the attention span of a butterfly. None of this is hard to believe.

As an ex-teacher, I cannot help noticing too that we are all tending to adopt a kind of text speak ‘Twitteresque’ style. People tend to write in soundbites, the fairly limited conventional vocabulary is liberally peppered with ‘OMG’, ‘LOL’ ‘Wowees’ etc; they/we are more ’emotional’ and extravagant with praise or criticism, quick to jump to conclusions rather than to take a measured approach. It is all rather superficial. However, it is very easy, very tempting – we don’t have to think too deeply and this all makes life simpler in the short term, and certainly more sociable via the keypad.

Does it make us more sociable in reality? I am always struck by the number of young couples one sees, arm in arm as they walk down the street, each transfixed – not by each other – but by an individual smartphone which holds their entire attention, away from each other. Are they texting one another? Are the sweet nothings coming via the screen? Or are they confiding to their separate friends the fact they’re walking down with the road with each other…? ‘OMG, wowed, I’m sooooooooooo excited…”.

But perhaps one is too harsh. Maybe they are playing brain games. I read encouraging reports from Luminosity readers about improved memory and concentration, becoming more alert, thinking more clearly and I am ressured to read that ‘the brain can reorganize itself when confronted with new challenges, even through adulthood. If you hear nothing more it will be not through modesty, but embarrassment.

Do Real People Ever Actually Win a Competition?

One never expects to win, and many of us may have wondered cynically whether a real person ever does. Does ‘ecstatic Mr B from John O’Groats’ really exist, or ‘Pensioner Mrs J from Land’s End’? Or have they been dreamt up by someone in some PR department?

Well, we can tell you ‘Competition-winner Sal C from Birmingham’ is no figment of the imagination of any (non-existent in our case) PR department. She really does exist. She and Andrew have just spent the weekend here with us in Douglas’s Barn.

To prove it here is a hurried photo taken by John when they came to say goodbye! We persuaded them back to Douglas’s Barn where they very good-naturedly sat on the sofa, still in their outdoor clothes poor things, as they were all set to leave.

Even Sal had not been too hopeful of any chance of success; after she had left we found this delightful and totally unsolicited entry in the visitors’ book:

“Last winter, I was sat on a delayed commuter train and saw a competition to win a weekend break in ‘Jane Eyre country’, in Stylist magazine. Having forgotten I had even entered I was very surprised when I received an email to say I’d won! I had four Premier Cottages to choose from and quickly chose Douglas’s Barn and am very glad I did! We’ve had a lovely relaxing and peaceful weekend in Douglas’s Barn. The barn is equipped with everything you could ever need! Thank you for a lovely stay!”

So, top marks to Premier Cottages, with their ‘unparalleled track record for excellence’! It looks as if we have all ended up winners: Sal and Andrew having had by all accounts a wonderful weekend, we having had some charming and grateful guests and Premier Cottages for once again providing unbeatable quality for their guests and owners.

Certificat d’Excellence pour Tom’s Barn et Douglas’s Barn

I know we’ve been dashing thither and thither recently, but I bet you didn’t know that Tom’s and Douglas’s Barns has been on the move too: we appear to have been transported to France…

A few days ago we received this rather handsome table plaque from TripAdvisor, accompanied by a warm letter of congratulations, in French. The plaque, rather conveniently has an English translation on the reverse, but no such political correctness for the (French) letter.

I mock, but not seriously. Whether in English or French, we are delighted that, thanks to those of our guests who have taken the trouble to write a review, TripAdvisor has seen fit to award this acknowledgement. We have said before, but we feel so lucky to have such lovely guests who seem to be so happy with everything, even when the weather is bad. We often hear dread tales of ‘the guests from hell’, but we are lucky enough to feel with nearly all of ours that we would be grateful to count them as friends.

It’s not all sweetness and light. We do have problems from time to time – flooding boilers, power cuts, deep snow, a fridge going on the blink on Christmas Eve… Fortunately – thanks to our great band of loyal and kindly local’tradesman’ and the fact that we live next door and can usually come to the rescue somehow (and that our guests tend to be very understanding and sympathetic) the problems are usually quickly resolved or turn into the opportunity for a party, such as when we have the odd power cut and entertain by candlelight.

And such as also once when our really lovely guests from Edinburgh couldn’t leave because their little car was knee deep in snow but the incoming guests insisted stoutly that absolutely nothing would prevent them from getting here.

We end with two photos that seem to sum up what it’s all about, and neither any credit to us. We are simply fortunate to live in such a lovely area as the Peak District and we can bask in its reflected glory. The views, the walks – with or without dogs, the soothing peace and quiet of our little corner: we appreciate them as much as anybody and it is a privilege to be able to share them with our guests and revel in their enjoyment.

Why on earth ask us about holiday cottages?

A disclaimer: Presuming to write this does sound horribly big-headed, but we have been asked for advice about holiday cottages over the years by a number of friends, colleagues and relations and we have just had another urgent plea from a family friend, so John and I have tried to put our thoughts together, hopefully helpfully.

It’s funny the way things go – one spends ages feeling a complete novice and long before feeling at all confident – if indeed one ever does – suddenly people start asking for advice. This massive status leap takes some getting used to.

The fact is that we have now been going for well over a decade. Tom’s Barn’s transformation from dilapidated cow shed’ to des. hol. res’ took place in 2000; Douglas’s Barn, the newbie on the block, only saw the light of day in 2006.

Over the years we have learnt a lot, and still are learning, all the time, but are very happy to share what we have learnt with anyone interested, and also to pick other people’s brains too. One could never claim to have all the answers.

We take it very seriously, absolutely love it and live it. We don’t think of it as a business as such but nor is it a little hobby on the side. It more feels like a happy extension of what John and I have been involved in all our adult lives (and my parents before that in their career abroad) – looking after people and doing all one can to ensure they are comfortable and happy! So, here goes…

1: First do your research!

Assuming you have a property in mind (if not, look for somewhere in an attractive area, reasonably near you or someone extremely responsible) our first advice to anyone thinking of launching out, is to do your homework with an eye on the local market and of course, the available budget. Ask around – is there a gap in the local provision or might you be overloading it? What seems to go well locally? Will you easily be able to find essential local suppliers and domestic help?

I’d recommend at this stage sending for holiday cottage brochures and looking at websites to help get a feel for what’s around and what you’re aspiring to. Look at local holiday cottage websites and talk to local owners; think of your local colleagues as friends and not competitors. it can be a lonely business if you’re all on your own and you’ll find sharing information and support with them is invaluable.

Also, it might be worth getting in touch with your official local tourism people who might have some very useful information about the local situation, and also, just possibly, where you might get local professional advice or even financial help if you are tackling an ‘interesting’ building. Locally there is an e-Business club which provides wonderful training workshops for people setting up new businesses (no longer free sadly, but still modestly priced). It would be worth finding out if there is anything similar in your area.

At this stage possibly start thinking about good local builders, sympathetic to what you are trying to achieve, and architects if appropriate. Depending on what you are hoping to do, and to what, you may have to get planning permission from your local District Council for change of use or whatever is deemed necessary – it’s best to be safe if you’re in any doubt! In our case, the Peak Park authorities have a big say in any project and it is very wise to work with them from the start.

2. Decisions

Bearing in mind what clues you’ve picked up about the potential demand local support, think hard about the kind of holiday cottage you would like to have – cheap and cheerful or more expensive and select, for families with children or cosy twosomes, for big parties and group celebrations or perhaps as part of a creative centre running classes and demonstrations…?

We would always advise going for the highest standard you possibly can, whatever you category you plump for. Ask the Visit England Quality in Tourism people for their booklet explaining their grading system, with guidelines for the relevant star grading, 5 being the top. This way you will get a clear idea of what needs to be done to achieve – without too many tears and tantrums – the standard you would like.

By this time you should be ready to start making some concrete plans… Stage two in a few days!

I couldn’t rest putting in this pic of Orchard Farm as it was. It’s not really relevant at all, but it is in so much as it gives an indication that we have a track record of sorts!

Madam, you have a knife in your handbag

… The Swallows and I, we flew to South Africa leaving one husband/ swallow photographer behind…

The swallows will fly over western France to South Africa, at an average speed according to the RSPB of 35 mph, in search of warmer weather and juicier insects. No security checks, iris recognition checks, ‘six clear pages in the passport’ worries for them.

I too have flown to South Africa, but rather faster at about 500 mph, to see my sister again who is recovering slowly in hospital; juicy insects were something I did my best to avoid (nearly successfully).

The weather was not particularly good apart from a couple off beautiful sunny mornings but with most of the time spent in an air conditioned hospital the weather was not a priority. However I must admit that on Saturday I did enjoy a super breakfast in the sunshine on the Durban beach front with a friend of my sister which felt refreshingly if briefly holiday-like.

Not so the question mark, the permanent blot perhaps, on my security status. “Did you pack your bags yourself?” “Could anyone have tampered with your luggage?” I answered confidently. “Could you please step this way, madam?” Off I stepped, puzzled.

The security man lowered his voice, “We have identified a knife in your bag.” I expressed horrified disbelief and then remembered my darling husband had packed one of his special picnics for me to eat in the train to London. He is well known for his delicious picnics, always with a surprise or two, never dull.

I had eaten most of it in the train but not the last few foil-wrapped things which I had imagined enjoying at Heathrow. The explanation was obvious. My hand flew to my mouth as I realised the significance of my confiding to the official about the picnic with unknown surprises packed into my bag for me by my husband…

Sure enough: there was a table knife, and a small foiled wrapped avocado (grenade?). He tested the blade for sharpness. It was fortunately blunt. He tested it for length. It was longer than is acceptable. So the knife was confiscated, and the avo/grenade, and my bag and its contents taken away for specialist checks. Fortunately no explosives were identified; it was soon returned and I was allowed to move on.

I did feel very foolish. Locking back on it, it was very reassuring that the knife was spotted, and how the situation was dealt with. The young security man was charming – courteous and polite throughout – he probably thought I was some poor old soul who shouldn’t be allowed out on my own but he couldn’t have dealt with the situation more pleasantly.

And now I am back again, hopefully with my security status unblemished. It is good to be back; it always is however much one has enjoyed being away and I have loved being with my sister and seeing my brother-in-law and some old friends.

It is good to be back. Everything seems to have run seamlessly in my absence, John, Janet and co proving me reassuringly dispensable. The air is sweet and everything always seems so peaceful, particularly after the hustle and bustle of air travel and airports these days. (Dubai airport at 3am was crowded with thousands of travellers rushing to their flight, eating exotic meals in the numerous restaurants or shopping in the amazingly glitzy shops… What meal is it, at 3 in the morning?)

Whatever it is, I shall do a personal security check on my next JFS picnic.

Interior Design Dilemmas

People often very kindly compliment us on the colour and furnishing and fittings in both barns, and it is easy to thank them graciously, brushing it off with a, ‘Well we had a lot of fun choosing everything”. Which is true up to a point, and mainly in retrospect. At the time one agonises.

And we have been agonising again – this time over quilt covers. We had been thinking, Janet, John, Carol and I that Tom’s Barn bedlinen was about due for a revamp, and when I was in London recently I found myself with a few hours to kill, in the Bedding section of John Lewis, in Oxford Street.

Whether it was my state of mind or the current fashion in bedding, but – well, for a start the most lovely ones were hundreds of pounds – designer designs – so out of the question. The next stage down, in standing if not in quality, everything seemed charmingly, if subtly, tasteful with very muted patterns and colours; ever practical I couldn’t help but suspect that very soon subtle might turn into faded and over-washed and just plain dull.

I did actually buy a very pretty plain – no subtlety here – duck egg blue set, in a lovely cotton; having previously bought a rather fun Emma Bridgewater (yes, I too thought she was just china and tea-towels) duvet cover with swallows, which as you can imagine met with John’s approval. While I was in J. Lewis I found a lovely dark blue sheet and pillow cases to go with it – so far so very restrained and good.

Common sense began to fade; I found I kept returning to the most vivid (lurid?) and exciting quilt cover, only to retreat once again as common sense briefly rallied. Time began running short and in desperation I blurted to the assistant, ‘Yes, I’ll have that rather vivid one after all’ and the die was cast. Back home, doubts returned twofold but I knew that if all was lost, John and I could keep the offending duvet cover for ourselves. Before launching it at our hapless guests I decided the only solution was to ask Facebook friends – this was surely consulting the market place.

The cover was displayed on our Tom’s Barn and Douglas’s Barn page and my doubts revealed. Responses were varied but tended towards the positive so it will be on the Tom’s Barn bed next Friday… Watch this space!

Historic Swedish Art in Staffordshire

First, a little teaser: would you want to play with these, build with these or eat them? In fact you shouldn’t really do any of these things, but least of all eat Sue Prince’s paint box!

At the risk of somewhat overdoing a Staffordshire theme, albeit quite unintentionally, last weekend we were back into Staffordshire, although in this case only a few miles from here.Sue Prince, one of those people who fills one with awe because they achieve so much and so successfully, but who turn out to be quite charming and normal when one meets them, had organised an art event at her home, as part of the Staffordshire Open Studios Open Art programme.

It was a pleasure to have an excuse to visit Sue and Terry’s organic Beechenhill Farm, in a beautiful setting right up high above Ilam.

Here they have converted one of their barns into a very striking high ceilinged studio cum art gallery/meeting/party room.

Sue’s art is amazing. Reminiscent of the style of the Bayeux tapestry, the process, inspired by 18th century decorative wall hangings known as Bonads, is based on an ancient Swedish type of painting which no one in Sweden knew how to do any more until Sue started going back to teach them!

Also exhibiting, as well as Sue, were several other artists including Parwich’s very own Jean Wayne, who was demonstrating her very attractive felting ‘creations’. We do have an impressive number of artistic souls in Parwich; that surely is the subject for another post, soon…!

A Christmas Treat Awaits!

There now follows a party political broadcast on behalf of anyone who wants to enjoy a relaxing and peaceful Christmas holiday away from it all.

Our lovely Tom’s Barn, a great favourite with dog lovers and non dog-lovers alike, is still available for Christmas! We find it hard to believe but it is true. Usually by this time, building up to a crescendo right up until Christmas, we are turning away people who have set their hearts – too late – on Christmas in one of our barns…

So you are still in with a chance. For £625 all found, you would have your perfect Christmas setting – complete with little tree and tasteful decorations. (Dogs wishing to celebrate Christmas with their owners will have to pay £25 each for the privilege!).

Whether Christmas will be hot and sunny, grey and wet, or crisp and white, who knows? But what we do know is that once inside the world that is Tom’s Barn, with the log burner blazing, music quietly playing, possibly your dog dozing happily at your feet, mouth-watering smells wafting over from that meal you have knocked up/ordered earlier, you’ll feel so happy and relaxed you won’t even know or care what the weather is doing outside.

That is a totally fulfillable promise: we won’t be singing any ‘We’re sorries!”.

And that is the end of the party political broadcast from Tom’s Barn.

Phew – you can turn the sound back on now… And do click on this link if you happened to want to book or check if it has gone yet.