Gather ye roses and all that – we find it very easy to succumb to every attractive chance to meet up with friends and/or attend interesting functions. Fortunately the wonderful Janet, Carol and co are on the spot so as far as our guests are concerned, there is no break in the service. As far as blogs etc go, the breaks in transmission are rather more obvious.

However, in brief – as estate agents always begin a lengthy list of dull features in the house they have little chance of selling – last weekend we were invited by some very generous friends to go to the Queen’s Club for the semi finals of what is now known as the Aegon Championships.

What a lovely day we had! We were very lucky with the weather, which dawned most unpromisingly, so we arrived at Queen’s amply provided with umbrellas, thermal vests and waterproofs. In fact the sun came out and we sat in sunshine all day. We saw three matches, ending with Andy Murray beating Benjamin Becker. Will this be the year Murray eventually wins Wimbledon?

Back home on Sunday, and like I am sure many of you,  we watched Andy win the finals before being greatly entertained by Boris et al appearing on court with Murray and Henman to raise money for the Royal Marsden.

Do you believe in TripAdvsaor?

‘The best’, ‘perfection’, ‘luxury…’. What does that mean to you and me?

It is hard to strike a balance, between a discreet modesty and blatant bragging but I am afraid today this will be nearer blatant bragging than we feel comfortable with. However, we were very delighted to read this latest review on TripAdvisor, written by guests who stayed recently in Douglas’s Barn. We were particularly delighted, because they told before they left us that they had stayed in many holiday cottages, were hard to please and had often been disappointed, which makes their comments all the more pleasing!

TripAdvisor is often feared, or decried, and one can only imagine how upsetting it must be to receive malicious reports from competitors or from guests who may well have behaved very badly during their visit to a bargain basement establishment somewhere that tuns out – rather unsurprisingly, to be rather unattractive. And of course there are always tales of employers churning out gushing, ecstatic reviews of their own accommodation.

I don’t know about you, but John and I certainly always consult TripAdvisor before booking somewhere to stay, or to eat. It is easy to spot and immediately discount the one-off angry blast or the very suspicious glowing comments that could only have come from the pen of someone in the know.

Also one decides what is important. Whenever we check out somewhere local  before recommending it to our guests, John always insists on inspecting the Gents. He reckons that if they can’t keep their loos clean, there isn’t much hope for their kitchen hygiene either, never mind anything else. I couldn’t agree more, but am equally concerned that everywhere – including the Gents but I have to take his word for that – looks and smells clean and that the service is sincerely friendly, not forced  ’friendly’ or even worse, ‘They’ve booked, so we don’t need to bother any more…”. If we’re considering booking a restaurant table, I am very concerned to read about the quality of the food. It’s no good going somewhere  sweet smelling, with spotless Gents’ loos if the food is dull or badly cooked.

However, one can’t always visit in person, and like many, I am more influenced by other users’ reports of what they actually experienced rather than the glowing description of facilities by the biassed owner/manager who has never tried them out for himself and in his enthusiasm risks -inviting disappointment, by over-promising the delights.

So, we are very happy to use TripAdvisor and are very grateful for nice comments written there by our Tom’s and Douglas’s Barn guests. Thank you!

I shall write a post soon, I fear, trying to define more clearly  what we mean by ’The best’, ‘perfection’, ‘luxury’ ‘top quality’ – all descriptions that we hear about Tom’s and Douglas’s Barns…

Our little Parwich Book Club has come of age!  All five original members are alive and well and still reading, 21 years later. One of the five left some years ago to move to Yorkshire with her husband and family but still returns once or twice  year, and most certainly at Christmas and 21st birthdays. (She has been replaced by another loyal member. We have numerous requests from other friends to join but we decided very early on that five, for us, was the optimum number. As it is we sometimes struggle to get a word in edgeways…)

Our 21st Birthday Book

We’ve read a lot of books in the 21 years and had as many interesting discussions. The liveliest are usually when at least one of has has not enjoyed a book. We had all enjoyed the Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton, but all the same we had some very stimulating discussions over our wine and nibbles: there were so many levels at which one could interpret the book, and so many topics and sub topics.

Essentially it is about the top layer of smart New York Society toward the end of the 19th century with its own extremely rigid set of social  expectations and obligations, which included the expectation of the dutiful, obedient, subservient wife who could not cope without strong guidance from her husband. Ironically, it is these very women who guard their status quo so rigidly, more rigidly possibly than the men.

The only people who get away with questioning these or showing any sort originality are those at the very top whose position is therefore unassailable (as for example the grossly fat Mrs Manson Mingott who entertains society with – shock! horror! – her bedroom in full view, and whose loyalty to family overrides any moral dilemmas about their  questionable behaviour…). Also, somehow, the men, altogether less restricted anyway in their lives, seem too seem to get away with preaching absolute standards of propriety whilst happily enjoying extra marital affairs and inappropriate business ventures on the side as long as discretion prevails.

This was the society that Edith Wharton had been brought up in, and shaped by. However,  she was writing the book after the first World War, having lived for some time in Paris, with its much more relaxed attitude to manners and morals. Rather than being ostracised as a writer – and therefore dismissed as ‘bohemian’ – as she would have been in New York, she had been  awarded the Legion of Honour for her involvement in the war. She was very critical of the inhibiting, repressive expectations of New York society which had no intention of adapting to any changes wrought by the war but at the same time she was alarmed by the social upheaval unleashed in Europe by that war.

Anyway, in the Age of Innocence Wharton reverts to a world long before World War 1. We were not sure who the main character really was? Was it Newland Archer, who marries May because he is committed to her, all the while in love with the socially questionable Count Ellen Olenska, his wife’s first cousin and a divorcee tainted by years of Parisian living? He is very dismissive of his wife May whom he sees as innocent (naive) and needing his guidance to make any sense of life. Ellen Olenska proves to be charming, but ultimately principled, and she and Newland never consummate their love for each other. Is she perhaps the main character, representing someone who has adapted successfully, as society has inevitable developed. She certainly is more interesting than May.

May however is not quite as dull and naive as it suits Newland to believe. Whilst feigning innocence, as the respectful and dutiful wife New York expects her to be, she is discreetly  aware what is happening: she has quickly sensed that Newland is very attracted – and tempted – by her cousin Ellen Olenska. In fact, quietly, she directs what happens. She befriends Ellen, and successfully manages to sabotage all Newland’s romantic plans and completely scuppers them  finally when she confides to Ellen that she is expecting a baby even before she has told her husband. Ellen will not consent to an affair with Newland knowing that May, her cousin, is expecting his baby.

So, not so innocent! Edith Wharton had suffered from her own repressive upbringing; she too had had an unhappy but socially ideal marriage, so it may be that she saw in May the repressed heroine, who was not able to escape openly but had to rely on working deviously, and extremely successfully, below the surface. However, if she is the heroine, she does nothing to change society. My vote is for the even less innocent Ellen!

It is extraordinary to think that for most people in this country the queen is just there, she has been queen all their life. The other thing is that most of you will be thinking, gosh, 6o years ago, that is history, how incredible to be that old.

It is, but for once I’d say, and what a privilege to be that old, to be able to remember the day of the Coronation, the excitement and pride, and concern, too, for this young woman who was taking on so seriously the commitment that life (her accident of birth) had imposed upon her.

And my memories, and emotions, were those of an even younger girl, a 12 year old at boarding school in Central Africa. No telly in the whole of Southern Rhodesia (as Zimbabwe then was)  let alone for the Peter’s Diocesan School for Girls in Bulawayo  to watch. I suppose we must have listened to the coronation service on the wireless and later saw it all on news reels at the cinema in the holidays, probably several times. It all seems very familiar.

The excitement and sense of joy and patriotism in our school was intense. Our nuns were quick to point out the significance of having a woman on the throne, although at that stage it had never occurred to me that girls/women were assumed to be secondary, and inferior, to men simply because they didn’t wear trousers. At a girls only school, one accepted that girls did all have responsibility for themselves and others – and respect if it were due to them- as individuals rather than because of their gender.

A new Elizabethan Age? A young and beautiful woman, a mother of two tinies, taking on such responsibility, and for life? The pomp, the ceremony, the promise, after the ravages and death of the Second World War, the joy… We felt it all, all those thousands of miles away.

Our nuns, not known for their frivolity or generosity, let alone any hint of self-indulgence, set the seal on the significance of the day. We were each given at lunch a bottle of Coco Cola. We knew then that June 2nd 1953 was uniquely special.

And, 60 years later, I feel privileged to be able to share those memories with you, and celebrate! Perhaps this time with more than a Coke!

When a visit to Dunge Valley Gardens was first suggested by the Parwich Ladies’ Group, quite frankly I was not wildly excited. I think it was the name which conjured up  images in my mind of  gunge, dungeons… quite very childish I know, but words do intrigue me.

Curiosity took over. I had actually never heard of the gardens, and they’re in Cheshire, and grow Rhododendrons and Azaleas, which I do love but which hate our limestone soils so we can only grow them in pots (ours outside Tom’s and Douglas’s Barns are looking particularly lovely at the moment).

Our Azaleas we have to grow in tubs

It was chilly on Wednesday when we went, and grey and drizzly – not ideal weather – and we all were glad of winter coats with hoods! The gardens are technically Kettleshulme, about ten or fifteen minutes the other side of Buxton, but you would not find them by accident. It seemed miles up a windy and seriously narrow track, and then – with quite a sense of relief – suddenly once chances upon a fine looking stone house, with a pleasant enough  garden in front of it, with paths leading off it.

So it is a garden you explore, never quite knowing what you are going to come to next. There were wonderful specimens of Rhododendrons and other plants and trees, streams to cross and slopes to climb. It was lovely. Had the weather been kinder, it would have felt even lovelier. If you go, do take warm clothes and sensible shoes. Some if the paths were quite slippery even though obviously carefully maintained. There is a greenhouse with lots of healthy looking interesting plants for sale, which seemed quite expensive but maybe I’m out of touch.

I wanted to tell you about two things and the local paper, the Ashbourne News Telegraph, known familiarly as ‘the Stunner’, has got in first! Talk about being pipped at the post, but never mind, I can still tell you…

Firstly, Ashbourne has a new library! One keeps hearing of library closures so we feel very lucky to have such a wonderful new one, and right in the centre of things so it will be so much easier to pop in to borrow books and DVDs etc or use the free wi-fi.  The much smaller old one always felt rather out of the way and inconvenient if on was on a hurried shopping visit.

The new one is across the Henmore from Waitrose and here is a pic of John (one doesn’t often see him in a photo these days as he is the photographer and plainly I am not). I will also include another I took inside, of one section. It doesn’t show the bank of computers, all in use, and all the shelves are on castors so can be moved into different permutations as the need suggests.

On our same first visit of the library John spotted an urban moorhen, nesting peacefully below the crowds crossing the bridge above. The sun was shining albeit rather coldly, this being before this lovely sunny Bank Holiday weekend and I was struck by what a lovely little place Ashbourne is (see here for a brief Wikipedia summary to save me doing it!)… It is a town where a moorhen feels quite happy to raise its family.

It does have its numerous estate agents and charity shops where other types of shop used to be but it has always been known for its excellent independently owned shops and also there has been a number of small, new independent shops starting up over recent years, many not on the main streets but tucked away down little snickets: it’s worth exploring. It has everything, I think, a post office, several churches, numerous antique shops, three good butchers, a fishmonger, a couple of hardware shops, a couple of greengrocers, two excellent delis, numerous coffee shops and restaurants, two art galleries, several newsagents, book, dress, shoe and toy shops, Waitrose, M & S and Sainsbury’s and an excellent Majestic. Phew! And I am sure I have missed out several other categories… You’d be far better advised to look at the Visit Ashbourne website which will tell you all you need to know.

To my mind one of the many delights is that it is very old, with plenty of history, and really so small and friendly – and only minutes away from the countryside: not for nothing is it called the Gateway to the Peak District.

Fischer’s

However, on Wednesday John and I were fortunate enough to attend a foraging day there, led by Dr Patrick Harding, a renowned naturalist, being shown what a wealth of food there is to be found for free in spring.

We all know about nature’s wonderful autumn  harvests of damsons, sloes, mushrooms, blackberries and so on but apart from wild garlic and elderflowers we were hard pushed to think what else might be available at this time of year.

Dr Harding is probably best known in his role as a ‘mycologists’ – an expert in the study of mushrooms and his delight was unfeigned when on our foraging ramble  round the beautiful Fischer’s garden we chanced upon an edible but dreadfully poisonous-looking layered saddle mushroom apparently also called Dryad’s saddle and Pheasant’s back… We were prepared to take on trust that this was edible, if slightly tough.

He is also interested in the chemicals present in plants, and the medicinal and other uses these are put to. We however concentrated on the edible, and how one can pep up a salad with chickweed or sweet cicely and brighten it up with dandelion petals. One can make soup from the young leaves of nettles in spring, and pesto from ransoms, i.e. wild garlic leaves…

After an hour’s invigorating and enlightening ramble we returned to the hotel to enjoy a truly wonderful lunch, with every dish containing some of the wild plants we had learnt about. Fischer’s has a Michelin star so you can be sure a meal will always be delicious, attractively presented and what’s more pleasantly served. On Wednesday we all ate at one big table and the conversation and laughter flowed as well as at any successful private lunch party with friends.

My only regret was that I didn’t take notes. Several wise people did, and I thought it was all so interesting I would remember every word but my confidence was sadly misplaced. Lots of interesting snippets linger tantalisingly in the back of my memory.

John and I both enjoyed it so much we are planning to go to the autumn forage at Fischer’s on October 22nd and this time I will take notes.

Having recently been to Florence we have been hoping to plan a trip to Pompeii some time, and  were most excited to learn about the plans for the Pompeii and Herculaneum  exhibition, which is on until September at the British Museum. John and I are going in June all being well but I was lucky enough – having already planned one of my fairly regular little jaunts down to London – to be able to attend  a private viewing of the exhibition this morning with our daughter Ruth whose official invitation most generously included me!

What a treat! The exhibition is beautifully mounted, with hundreds of wonderful  relics never before seen in this country or even possibly ever outside Italy. I went round it twice, once during the private viewing and then again, with an audio visual thingy afterwards.

So many things struck me, it’s hard to know what to begin with, but perhaps it is the human element. You feel you are almost intruding on the lives of people going about their daily chores and pleasures  one moment and and in the next  destroyed by the erupting Vesuvius.

Their  ghastly tragedy is our great fortune, because, thanks to the ferocity and nature of the eruption so much was preserved for us to view now, over two thousand years later.

An interesting fact which i had not appreciated is that the two cities were affected in very different ways, and at different times, although equally devastating. Pompeii was covered by several feet of ash and afterwards was revisited by people returning to rescue items and presumably by looters and many centuries later was much easier for archeologists to explore.. Herculaneum was buried much deeper, and hit by a hotter wall burning gas which meant that everything was instantly carbonised, and preserved, but was harder to retrieve.

Another very striking thing I found was how civilised their society was; this is before Christ, when one suspects that in this country people were lagging behind more than somewhat. There was widespread if not mass literacy, slaves were frequently given their freedom, woman had (more or less) equal rights although they were not allowed to vote, trades flourished, houses were and elegant sophisticated and well furnished – apart from their toilet arrangements: apparenty these were normally situated in the kitchen so that human and catering waste could be dealt with simultaneously. They loved their gardens, feasting and entertaining; they had boundary disputes between neighbours, and so on… It all felt quite incredibly ‘normal’.

Which of course makes the tragedy that befell them all the more heart rending. Ironically, in one of the scenes depicting a banquet there is a notice imploring the guests to eat and drink as much as they could , because ‘tomorrow we die’. Little did they know.

Alicia and Stephen, off to explore the White Peak in a sidecar from Russia

There are so many things to do while you’re staying in Tom’s and Douglas’s Barns that even the the choice of ‘usual’ things can be overwhelming. There’s which walk to go on? Where to go? Shall we visit Chatsworth, Haddon, Hardwick, Keddleston, Lyme Park or Sudbury? Or perhaps Tissington (the Well Dressings are on as I write (May 9-15 2013)… Then again, there’s the World Heritage site at Cromford, or Buxton Opera House or even Alton Towers or the various caverns. You can hang glide or make chocolate.

I’m only just getting going – haven’t mentioned the wonderful pubs and Farmers’ Markets, Chatsworth Farm Shop or the Cheese Shop but before I bore you rigid if I haven’t already, there’s one activity that wouldn’t necessarily come immediately to mind.

And that is Bill Purvis’s Sidecar Safari. We knew of it, and indeed knew that Bill offered Peak District Premier Cottages guests a half price discount but we hadn’t actually seen it in action. It took (as so often) our guests to introduce us to what’s available locally. Alicia and Stephen were staying for their honeymoon in Tom’s Barn last week. They packed as much as possible into their stay, including a trip in the Safari Sidecar, planned for after lunch on Tuesday.

Great was the excitement. At 2 o’clock Alicia and Stephen were waiting in their outdoor kit (Bill provides proper motor cycle gear), John had his camera at the ready while I fussed around excitedly as we waited for the sound of a motor bike.

Greater still was the excitement when we could hear it coming up our hill and turning in the gate, gleaming in its Russian khaki beauty. Helmets and jackets were donned and off they went, to Biggin, Hartington, the Manifold Valley, Wetton, Stanshope and Tissington and back through the ford (twice apparently!).

They returned about 3 hours later, glowing with fun and achievement, and Bill looked as if he had throughly enjoyed it too. Alicia and Stephen say it was the highlight of their stay: they’d had a wonderful sightseeing trip passing through some beautiful scenery, with lots of friendly waves from everyone they passed. And they were so grateful for the half price discount Bill gives all our guests (we’re wondering now if John and I will qualify too..?).

£475 for Tom’s Barn, Friday 17 to Friday 24 May (i.e. this coming week)

We are not used to Tom’s Barn having an empty week, especially considering I spend so much time writing emails explaining to disappointed enquirers that we are full when they want to come.

And now we have a week, without a single enquirer, not even someone who wants to book and  bring along Aunt Myrtle and three teenage kids (I’m serious – we do get requests like that but we always take them seriously and redirect them to friends and colleagues who are better placed than we to accommodate large family groups).

Anyway, rather than leave it empty we decided we would let Tom’s Barn, just this one week in glorious May, at the mid-winter rate of £475 (no lower winter rates for dogs unfortunately – they still will cost £25 each, extra.

If you haven’t been before and want to check out what other people think, have a glance at some of our TripAdvisor reviews.

Even if it’s no good to you, please do spread the word.